Time for another rambling baseball post

Happy All-Star Break! As the league’s best prepare to putz around in Denver for a bit, it feels like a good time to take the sport’s temperature. I’d say we’re looking at lukewarm.

If you’ve read me before, you’ve probably picked up on the fact that I spend a lot of time thinking about the state of America’s Pastime. This year has been no different, although my thoughts have drifted in a new direction. Instead of pissing on stupid teams doing dumb things or spitballing about new rules that might make the game more exciting, I’ve got one simple thing I’d like to ask all the players, executives, and owners.

Stop being such a bunch of unlikable jerks.

When the sport enters the broader news cycle it’s always for some bullshit. Some owner’s being cheap. Some large athlete is being shitty to the people they’re supposed to care about. Someone’s cheating, and the powers that be are diving in to stop it in the most ham fisted way possible. And now, in a moment when income disparity is all over the zeitgeist and we’re all more aware than ever of how our wages have stagnated, there are rumors of another work stoppage next season because a bunch of rich terds can’t agree on how to share their bazillions of dollars.

God, just stop it. Stop being a bunch of dinks. Do you have any idea how badly you’re all turning people off? Do you even care? Do you realize we have more entertainment options than ever and we’re all going to leave if you don’t give us people we can actually root for?

You don’t, do you? You just don’t get it. You’re exhausting, baseball. I hope you cut the crap and grow up.